Prayers

Last week I was struggling. I felt like I was having thoughts whispered into my ear by someone other than the Holy Spirit. Honestly, it was a huge burden on my soul. I felt weighted down. The thoughts I was thinking were things I didn't even want to say. I didn't want to give the evil one a foothold. I wanted to write someone, tell someone, do something to unload these cumbersome contemplations. Instead, I silently struggled.

The Sabbath came and with it a peace I hadn't felt in a while. Yesterday I felt the same peace. Today was when I realized that I am not feeling the attack that I was last week. The enemy's campaign against me has been thwarted. Praise the Lord, that He has fought off the enemy from entering my thoughts. Jesus has triumphed for me, again!

I myself was barely able to pray last week. I felt so unworthy to even speak to the Lord because of the things in my mind. I needed someone to pray for me. I needed someone to lift me up and carry me to Jesus in prayer. But I didn't ask anyone. I didn't talk to anyone.

However, I am positive that someone, somewhere, has been praying specifically for me. I am so thankful for that care and concern! Thank you, whoever you are, for your prayers on my behalf. Please know that I am feeling God's love and grace and protection because you have taken the time to speak to our Father in heaven on my behalf.

I thank Jesus for putting me on your heart.

Out of Babylon

I have a confession. I spent a good part of last month, and the month before, watching an old TV show. I had never heard of it when it was actually on TV, but the basic plot of the show was interesting, and so I started watching the episodes on the internet (you can watch almost any show on the internet). There came a point where I kept watching just so that I could find out how the show ended. And then it was over.


Well, after wasting all that time and mind space, I have been doing some contemplating. Yes, the basic plot of the show was good, but there were many things in that show that were not good. I'll name some of them: premarital sex, homosexuality, abortion, atheism, hedonism, pantheism, and so much more. There was a concerted effort in this show to blur the lines between right and wrong. There was a concerted effort made in the show to proclaim that there is not one way that is right. Everyone can be right at the same time. I'm okay, you're okay. Anything goes.


As I was contemplating, I kept thinking about the verse in the Bible that says, "And I heard another voice from heaven saying, “Come out of her, my people, lest you share in her sins, and lest you receive of her plagues." (Revelation 18:4)


I know there are many things in my life that need reevaluating. I don't need to fill my mind with raunchy jokes, extramarital affairs, homosexuality, murder, torture, kidnappings, spiritualism, pantheism, occultism, and all the confusion that is Babylon. God is calling me to come out of Babylon. I think I am ready. 


What about you?

On My Mind

Things on my mind
Too many to name
New nephew, floodwaters, Babylon

Things on my mind
Too much to explain
Afraid I will just babble on.

Two Years Past

Who knows what would have happened if not for the sorrow we endured two years ago.

I still think about that baby. The little lifeless form on the ultrasound. The pain and heartbreak that I felt. I never attached a name to that child. I don't know why not. I know some people do. I know that Jesus had a special name for "him" though. I always believed that baby was a boy.

Without that disappointing sorrow, we wouldn't have the joy of Haven today. I know that God is Love. I will never forget the child that might have been, but I am so thankful to God for the joy and laughter He has blessed us with through our two wonderful girls. 

Taking Hope to the zoo during that weekend two years ago.

Miracles

In the beginning, God made our world out of something formless and empty. 

God spoke and there was light, air, earth, sun, moon, stars, trees, plants, fish, birds and animals.

God breathed into man and he became a living person.

I consider these all pretty miraculous. Who else could do any of this?

God sent a flood, that opened the fountains of the deep and poured water from the sky as had never happened before, to cleanse the earth of man's wickedness.

God gave an old couple a child of promise. He parted the Red Sea, parted the Jordan River, and caused the walls of Jericho to tumble. God sweetened the bitter waters, many times in fact. Water gushed from the rock at God's command. Manna came from heaven. God routed armies, told the sun to stand still, and even turned back time. God can work miracles for His people!

God sent oil and flour without fail, with water in the well. He brought a boy back to life. He carried his prophet away in a whirlwind with chariots of fire. This is only scratching the surface. There's lots more!!!

When Jesus came:

A virgin conceived and bore a son. An old, barren woman also conceived and bore a son.

Water became wine. Paralytics walked, the dumb spoke, the blind saw, the demoniacs were freed. The dead rose to life again. Jesus is able to do the miraculous. He can still do these things!

Five thousand were fed with five loaves and two fish. Water walking was not out of the question. The wind and waves obeyed His command. A woman's faith and the touch of His garment brought healing. A little girl woke up. Lazarus came out of the tomb. The widow's son was returned to her alive. I could go on and on and on... Even the Bible says that there was so much more that Jesus did than what they were able to record.

Miracles. God performs them for His people. Jesus says, "Whatever you ask in my name, that will I do. If you ask anything in my name, I will do it. If you abide in me and my words abide in you, you will ask what you desire and it shall be done for you."

Oh me of little faith! Lord, I believe. Please help my unbelief!

For My Friend

Dear Friend,
I know your heart is hurting. It's been one awful thing after another, and to top it off your body has decided to take a break as well. Please know that I am praying for you. For your heart and for your back. Healing for both.

I know that it is so easy to blame God and to want distance from Him. He is more than big enough to handle the yelling, the raised fists and the blame. He's still right beside you, though. He's holding you in His arms. He's crying with you and knows all the pain that you're feeling.

I've been thinking about you today, dear friend. And I want to tell you something that Jesus said, and that I believe He is saying to you right now. He is saying, "“Come to me, you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." I believe that the pain in your back is a blessing of rest given to you from God. He knows that you need time to just be, to sit and cry, read and pray. A time to heal.

I am praying for you, dear friend. I am praying that your back will be brought back to perfect strength and health. I am praying that your heart will find healing as well. May you have Christ's peace in Your heart, and may you again know His joy. You are and will continue to be in my prayers.

Your sister in Christ,
Kelli

Thoughts from Today...

I don't even know how to start this... I have so many thoughts running through my head at the moment. For one thing, I am very thankful for the Sabbath and that I can just be, and remember the One who made me. Having two children increases the amount of effort it takes to just take it easy on Sabbath.

I very rarely feel like I am a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad mother. Today I did feel that way.

Honestly, sometimes I feel like we do not allow Hope to be a carefree child enough. Sometimes, I would just love to let her be, without constantly guarding and watching and cautioning and correcting. Sometimes I feel like I am just too hard on her. She is not even three years old yet.

Then, I learn that I do not discipline enough. I let Hope get away with too much. Don't ask me how I learned this, but believe me, I learned. And this was not something that I learned on my own. So now I just feel inadequate. Where is the happy medium? How do I teach my child about boundaries, kind ways of playing and what is appropriate and inappropriate? Are timeouts not enough? Is spanking too much?

I AM NOT ASKING FOR ADVICE... These are only my thoughts.

On a happier note, I also learned today that I am able to squeeze back in to my size 6 prematernity pants. Yay! I still have plenty of other things to work on besides my pant size though, including my parenting.

Oh Lord, please be my guide. Help  me to lead my children and train them well. Help me to lead them to You.